Do you wish to hug…?

Listening to the Spirit

Prayer for Forgiveness and Reconciliation

Gracious and merciful God, the problems facing our human family are very grave and we are no longer isolated from one another. We are confronted daily with our addiction to violence, our hatred and our greed. We are heartbroken. The media are relentless in their presentation and critique and we all long for some good news. It is so easy to forget that your Son, Jesus, is always the good news and that he has given us the remedy for our brokenness. “Father, forgive them, they don’t know what they are doing.” He spoke so clearly. We ask your Holy Spirit to remind us of this again and again. We ask you for the gift of hope in our lives and know that we need to turn to one another for the confidence and assurance that we will emerge from situations, that, in the short term seem hopeless. Banish fear and anxiety from our hearts.

Tonight we gather to affirm one another and to remove the barriers that seem to sour our relationships and keep us at a distance. Heal the short tempers, the crabbiness and the grudges we hold, against one another, against our political system, against our Church, against our financial institutions. We could go on and on. Prompt us to be beacons in the present darkness, and especially beacons to one another. We are all guilty of some selfishness, many of us have lived beyond our means and we become angry and irrational and embrace ideologies that protect our acquisitions. We need your help to stop contributing to the larger greed that tears at our world. We believe in the power of your grace to change our lives and we promise tonight to be once again open to that grace. Bless us with a peaceful spirit and a desire to be reconciled with one another.

Amen.

Source: https://www.thomasmorecenter.org/resources/prayers/prayer-for-forgiveness-and-reconciliation/

Listening to the Word

Mt 18:15-20

Jesus said to his disciples: “If your brother sins against you, go and tell him his fault between you and him alone. If he listens to you, you have won over your brother. If he does not listen, take one or two others along with you, so that ‘every fact may be established on the testimony of two or three witnesses.’ If he refuses to listen to them, tell the church. If he refuses to listen even to the church, then treat him as you would a Gentile or a tax collector. Amen, I say to you, what- ever you bind on earth shall be bound in heaven, and what- ever you loose on earth shall be loosed in heaven. Again, amen, I say to you, if two of you agree on earth about anything for which they are to pray, it shall be granted to them by my heavenly Father. For where two or three are gathered together in my name, there am I in the midst of them.”

Reflection

Do you wish to hug, to embrace the person with whom you had a problem, or from whom you were hurt?
To forgive it is not easy. Sometimes we say: “it is impossible.” But I would like to go back to the question proposed at the beginning: “What is in your heart?” “Is there any desire to be reconciled with that person?”
As Christians we should keep alive the DESIRE, the DREAM that one day we will be able to forgive, we will be reconciled with the person who did something bad to us.
Matthew, in today’s Gospel, refers to the difficulties in the relationships within the Christian Community. I would like to underline three points:

“If your brother sins against you, GO”. Jesus invites us to go to our brother or sister. According to my experience, when somebody hurts me, usually I prefer not to react immediately, but to take time and to spend at least 24 hours, before thinking about how to act. I believe that it is wise to adopt such a strategy, but it can happen that one person because she/he does not have enough courage, because she/he is afraid of the reaction of the other one, does not take any initiative and she/he leaves things to go thinking within herself/him that “it is useless”, “She/he will not change idea”, etc. Jesus is clear: GO! He seems to tell us that we must move and to think about what the best way is to approach the person and to find the right means to talk with her/him.
There is another important attitude, coming out from the gospel, that we must not forget: “LISTENING”. Sometimes it can happen that we do not allow the person to talk, because we want to justify, to defend ourselves. That is normal, but we have to be wise enough to allow the other person to express her/his feelings, reasons, and what she/he felt when we did something wrong to her/him. On the other hand, hopefully, the person after sharing with us her/his pain, she/he will also allow us to do the same; it means that she will be there listening carefully to us as well. Through this mutual listening, it is possible that the two persons will be able to lay the foundation for reconciliation.
The last one. I was not convinced about that, but once a friend told me: “Are you praying for your brother or sister that you perceive as an enemy?” I was shocked because, as a priest, I am faithful to prayer, but I have never thought of praying for my “enemies”. When I started doing it, I realized one more thing: God works in the hearth of my “enemy”. What I mean is that surely God is at work preparing for me the other person, my “enemy”, her/his mind and heart to welcome me when I will go to her/him. God wants to be present among us, and the God of mercy and tenderness cannot but desire the reconciliation of His children.

“Father is very hard to forgive…Father does not want to hear my apologies…”
Yes, it is not easy, but it is worthy to try because, as I said at the beginning, it is wonderful to be able to hug the person I conflict with.
“If he listens to you, you have won over your brother.” What a great JOY.