To be brothers among brothers! This is one of the values Xaverian Missionaries constantly inculcate in us, young seminarians. According to Saint Guido Maria Conforti, being brothers among brothers requires living out a deep "family spirit" centered on loving each other as brothers and respecting each other as princes. This spirit calls for cultivating genuine friendship and treating everyone with dignity, looking at companions as essential partners in a shared mission and journey. A question arises in my reflection– Paano nga ba tayo magiging totoo sa ibang tao habang nagiging totoo tayo sa ating mga sarili? (How can we genuinely be real with others while staying true to who we are?)
To love without defending. Our recent recollection taught us that love is not dependent. We are reminded to do everything with sincere motives regardless of being noticed or not. True service is doing good regardless of whether it is seen or otherwise. I have learned that each action, if done with love, is a prayer glorifying the Lord. Because all our works should not be meant to be seen by our companions, God sees the very motives of our hearts even before we perform any service.
To listen without defending. There are things better left unsaid. What requires a very good brotherhood is the ability to listen to your brother and realize that in this journey you have to be corrected. Being open to correction is a prerequisite to having a serene relationship in the community. In our seminary, we are taught to listen to the fraternal correction of our brothers—treating it not as a threat to our vocation, but as something that will strengthen us because it makes us aware of our blind selves. The best reaction to such correction is not an aggressive and defensive response, but a heart that is willing to take its wisdom for our own personal growth.
To speak without offending. We are taught that our opinions are meant to improve our brothers. It is not simply about the content of what we are to speak, but even the way we deliver the speech. In the seminary, I learned that aggressiveness in correcting your brother is never the right or effective way to help them. What counts as good fraternal correction is something delivered calmly after thorough reflection. The gospel reminds us that correction in public is never the right way. Instead, we have to talk to our brothers one-on-one with God as our witness, and the rest will just follow. As we journey in our formation, we are each other's formator as well.
To live without pretending. Truly, the bravest we can be is to be ourselves. In my journey, we were taught to avoid hypocrisy and superficiality. What and who we are according to our speech must be reflected in our actions. Our lifestyle must be one that corresponds to the reality of the gospel while living our own authenticity. Just like how Jesus warns against hypocrisy in the gospel, we are constantly reminded in formation to be true to ourselves. By being who we really are and by living the gospel every day, we become living witnesses toward our brothers and other people as well.
Paano nga ba tayo magiging totoo sa ibang tao habang nagiging totoo tayo sa ating mga sarili? It is to love without depending, to listen without defending, to speak without offending and to live without pretending.
Recollection August 2026 by PH-Delegation
